I've been thrown out of better places

 Something I forgot to mention yesterday.... 

Remember when I talked about how I was working hard at physical therapy, trying to do all the things right - trying to do it all to avoid surgery.

Do you know - I spent 7 weeks leaving work early to get to the stupid times they had.  I would go in & feel extremely uncomfortable because I was coming from work & had on work clothes & everyone in the PT place looked like athletes who were training for the Olympics.  Leggings, shorts, all the muscles.

& here I came in at the end of a work day looking like a bus had run over me. Felt like it too.

& do you know, over these 7 weeks.... I was doing the SAME stupid exercises from week 1.  Push a ball into a wall - forward - backway - sideways....

I will say, one week, I took a day off (this was before my coworker left for her surgery) & I had a new therapist. It was a woman - & she was amazing! She gave me a deep tissue massage in my shoulder & my bicep tendon. She worked my arm to make it move further than it had for months.  I was like, where have you been my whole life? .... she only works 2 days a week, in the morning. Tears. I want her!

Finally, after all this time - after ALL THIS MONEY (do you know how expensive out of pocket PT is, even with decent insurance???) - I have had no progress.

Worst of all - they made me feel awful. Very demeaning really. Like my pain wasn't real. I mean, they did this same exercise for 7 weeks  over & over & over for beginners - why was I not improving? #sarcastictone

The last day I was there, at the end of my session - Which - GET THIS - they left me in a dark room to do deep breaths... EXCUSE ME? I'm paying to inhale air for therapy on my arm now? 

.... they sat down with me & said, "What do you want to do? This obviously isnt working"... Ya think? 

In the end, they told me its not worth coming back until I had an MRI so they could work with me. 

OK... good with me.

I left in tears because mainly, I'm so frustrated & I had such high hopes. Plus, I left feeling so small. So out of place. So blamed for my issues & no progress.

Now, I'm glad I'm outta there... & looking for a new PT for when I eventually get surgery.  Going to feel like a real Pretty Woman moment in my life when I get my arm fixed & I drive by & give a good ole wave!

Or at least I hope so.

Little updates

 Hi all!

So what's the latest? Still in lots of pain... but I did get a new steroid shot in my arm - which has given me a SMIDGEN of relief.  But of course, if you know me, you know I dont get anything without it having some sort of effect. 

This time around, this cortisone shot has messed ME UPPP!!! My blood pressure has been high, I've been sweating buckets, my neuropathy has been flared up - I pretty much thought I was having a heart attack 20 times.  yeahhhh - I'm not sure I'll do that shot again.

I just need surgery to fix this arm. Just fix me people! No more band aids please.

But, while my arm is giving me a little break, I figure I'll do some little posts.

Like i've mentioned, my blog is for memory sake more than anything... so you may just see quick little posts documenting thoughts, my days, pictures, just simple things. ... talk about OLD school blogging!

I wont be hosting Thankful Thursday still because I dont know what a day will hold for me & Jen is doing fantastic at it - & if anyone wants to step in & help her as I think she is going to take a break soon too - please feel free to step in. You can reach out to Jen or send me a message & I can connect you! 

Some weekend highlights

* we almost got ANOTHER Aussie this weekend. My SIL tagged me on FB about an 18 month aussie that needed a home. She is GORGEOUS! We messaged about her & there was one other person ahead of us that reached out & they were coming to see her that day - they were going to message us if they didnt take her.... apparently they did. That's OK.  Glad she got a new home

* & Speaking of dogs... this big boy turned 9 this past week! 9!!! I cant believe it. 

* It feels like the world is melting. My goodness, its been horrible. & to think the worst of summer lays ahead in August. 

* A deer took its anger out on Hubby!  Ran right into the side of his truck... This is the truck that gets washed & waxed & cleaned every weekend to keep it in tip top shape. Ironically, Hubby's car was broken down the day before so he had to drive his truck to work & this happened.  Talk about bad timing!

* If you dont follow my Planner Instagram account, I am now getting to rep 2 planners & the cutest sticker company - check out the bars at the top of the blog for links if this is your thing.

* We got to celebrate my MIL's birthday last weekend!  Always fun to see the whole gang & play some games & catch up on the latest

* I got teary eyed at the trailer for the new Black Panther. #WakandaForever

* ..... & just file this under the "why women live longer than men"

I mean... there are 3 dogs that run without giving a care whats in their path that run in this yard.  Sure... this is a brilliant ahead. Wonder why I have gray hair?

* finally, we had a visit from our Nashville gang a few weeks back - just in time to go to a parade where it RAINED popcorn. Seriously. We had so much fun experiencing this Popcorn Festival in a local town near us.

Also note - right after this... this family got to go through covid AGAIN! This is the 3rd time for Julie! What in the WORLD! Geez. Gear up for the school year folks - its gonna roll hard again.

Tell me the latest with you since I've been MIA - what have I missed?

Thankful Thursday continues

No, I didnt fall off the face of the planet... I'm still around.  Just around in misery & sporting ice most of the day.

What's happened?  Well, you know I've been complaining mentioning about my arm pain & how awful it has been.  The past week & a half, I am now covering for a coworker, who ironically is out with issues with her arm as well.  A friend asked me, what is happening at your job that everyone's arms are falling apart? Great question.

I literally am so busy, some days, they are so hectic, I just blink & the day is gone.

& after a full 9 hours of typing & writing & shuffling paper, by the time I get home, I am in tears. Legit tears.  The pain is excruciating!  I come home & I can barely even lift my arm up.  

Alas, no blog because I cant even think about typing one more thing - moving even my fingers makes the pain shoot up my arm.

So that's where I'm at. 

I miss blogging - miss hearing all about your worlds... I'm trying to stay caught up... & I hope to be back soon.

I go to the ortho doctor next week & I'm anxious to see what he says. Obviously, physical therapy isnt helping & I'm hoping another shot gives me some relief (Please Lord) & my PT told me, I just may have to go ahead & have surgery & just start on the road of recovery.... which I wont be able to get the surgery at least till my other coworker comes back - so that's still 2 months of pain ahead.... sigh.

Anyways - I wanted to give a quick note that my friend Jen is still carrying on Thankful Thursday each week with a link up. Be sure to join in with her - I'm so happy she's still hosting this.  Jen's link is right HERE.  

Keep being thankful everyone!!!