Sooooo yeahhhh.... the past week has been a little upside down. To say the least.
I know so many of you have seen I was in the hospital ... & sent the sweetest & most encouraging words to me & uplifted prayers. I so appreciate each & every one of them. Truly. Dearly.
& I know I havent said a lot anywhere on what's happened because it's all still sort of confusing to me what happened - all I know is I'm sitting here with two open draining incisions in my body ... so there's that.
I'll warn you before we get started too - this is all honest, in your face for some of you that may get embarrassed easily, & while I'm not going to be graphic, it's still going to seem like it's all stupid - which I really think it is.
Only me... that's all I keep saying... Only me.
So, it all started with a sneeze. & yes, let's stop there & note that all of this, the ER trips, hospital stay, rushed into surgery, healing & pain.... all due to a sneeze. Welcome to my life.
But honestly, that's how it started. Ricky & I were driving home from a dinner & I sneezed so hard, he grabbed his ears & screamed "MY EARS"... & I screamed at the same time "MY BUTT"... he laughed - I wasn't laughing. I could tell something got hurt, injured, pulled, SOMETHING, in the bottom of my rear.
The next day it just got worse. It was so strange the feeling it was causing. I couldnt sit comfortably, I had a hard time walking, I just felt off.
I was supposed to go pick up my race packet for the half marathon on Friday & I couldnt even make it to the expo to pick it up because it hurt that bad to walk from my car to the front door of the fairgrounds.
I came home on Friday & tried to get comfortable.... except every minute, I was in more dire pain.
Finally, I told Ricky, we have to go to the ER. & let me tell you - there's nothing more awkward than going to the front counter & Telling them you have a pain in your butt that is an emergency.
But after a CT Scan, they found out I had a hematoma in my back side.... a pile of blood was pooling in my bottom that was so painful. They told me it should dissolve if I sit on heat & ice alternating & gave me an anti-inflammatory. I honestly was in worse pain coming home than going & just didnt know how I was going to survive the weekend.
Saturday, all I did was lay in bed. On my side. It was the only position I could stay in. Pain medicines kept me knocked out most of the day anyways.
& then Sunday morning, about 7am I just couldnt move. Literally, couldnt move. I couldnt sit, I couldn't walk, I could BARELY lay... it was the worst pain I've ever been in in my life.
Ricky tried to help me get in the bath for some hot water, but it just left me to screaming & crying.
I couldnt even sit in the car. Ricky had to open the back door & I had to fall on my side & pull myself in for the ride to the ER.
Once we got there, there was no one in the waiting room- thank goodness - except it still took about 30 minutes for them to get me back. All this time, I'm just shuffling up & down the hall - I would scream every time I would attempt to sit down & I couldnt even stand up straight. I know I looked like a crazed person.
They finally got me back & did another CT Scan on me & found out that the hematoma had turned into an abscess. & they got really concerned when my blood pressure & my heart rate was staying so high. My HR was staying around 142.... plus, I was carrying a fever reinforcing that infection was running through me.
Next thing I know, people are all around me. Filling me with drugs, asking me questions, confirming when I last ate (Thank goodness I had no appetite & hadn't eaten anything for the past 2 days) & next thing I know, I'm getting wheeling off to surgery!!!!
I was scared to death....
but I'm glad in a way everything moved so fast because if I sat & worried about a surgery to happen the next day, I would have probably been even more nervous.
I woke up to find that I had so much infection, they had to put in two incisions on both sides of my bum..... & one side had so much in it that my surgeon wants that side to stay open as long as possible, so it has to be packed ... twice a day. So it's been miserable ever since.
& God bless Ricky. He's been doing all the work of changing the packing - even when I scream & cry with every wound change.
One of the worst parts for me was that the surgeon said if the ER doctor told him I was there with a hematoma, he could have easily just drained it & left me with a little half inch scar & it would have been over with. Simple.... that turned into the biggest mess.
It's been pure misery.
& the scary & horrible & terrifying thing of it all? Having this issue, it leaves a 50% chance of it causing a fistula - which ONLY gets fixed by another surgery. 50%!!!! That's freaking me out... & ALSO, there's a 60 to 70% chance another abscess can happen again since its in such a strange area. They said that the bottom doesnt get much blood flow to heal like other parts of the body, so if it doesnt drain correctly, it will abscess again & we have to start from square one of this process.
I have literally been begging for prayers that this doesnt happen.... please pray for me. I can't bear thinking of doing this all over again.
I actually go to the doctor this morning for a follow up for him to see how everything is draining.
& I am still taking my antibiotics faithfully. I havent missed one dose. I want to knock this in the rear (no pun intended) & never have to think about this again.
... nor ever sneeze again.
I dont want to leave this on a debbie downer though.... I do have to say again how grateful I am for all the sweet people in my world. All the concern & love given... all the prayers already lifted.... all the visits at the hospital & flowers brought ... & phone calls asking for anything....& of course, for my husband who has been the best person to take care of me in all of this. He's been my rock this past week & I have to find some way to repay him for all the care & love he has lavished on me.
So praying friends.... continue to lift those prayers for me.
I'm hoping to get back to normal life soon. I miss normal life. I'm terrified for my new job - which my manager has called me & has been so supportive & encouraging as well & telling me not to worry since she already knows how much of a worrier I am...but I do still worry. I've been there 5 months & this happens. Geez.
Let's just hope that this is a done deal... the healing is happening.... correctly & fully & infection doesnt REAR its ugly head on me again (that pun was SOOO intended)
Here's to life... in all its adventures!