I just don't feel like doing it... today, I'm just sad...
We knew our yellow lab, or our "Yellow Dog" as we call her, Buffy, has been not herself lately. She's slowed down, which is expected for an 11 yr old big dog... she's been picky in her eating... been snippy with Bruno.
We decided to take her to the vet last night to see what was going on.
Yes, Ricky sits on the vet's floor with Buffy to let her know she's not alone |
First of all, we see her weight is down 25 lbs. We knew she was down but didn't realize she was down that much. On the good side, they said she's still considered overweight for a lab. WHAT? She's 72 lbs now... that's over weight? Wow... so they said they thought she looked healthy, but for her to loose that much weight that quickly, something was wrong.
So we were off with blood tests... which brought back some crazy high numbers that immediately showed something was wrong.
Next step - a urine test. Thank goodness they have assistants that are pro at catching dog pee... I woulda had it splashing in my face & in my eyes & not catch a drop... this young lady took her outside & snap - one jar of pee fresh to order...
That test came back looking like something was wrong too..
This was looking bad quick...
As we waiting on more blood tests, the vet was telling us that she thought it was the liver or the gallbladder or the pancreas. Buffy was sent back for ANOTHER test to check for pancreatitis, which is the best thing we were hoping for. It would require a hospital stay of an IV for a few days - let her pancreas rest, & then introduce her to food again. Please, let this be it...
.... pancreas came back fine...
The vet as we were waiting explained to us if it was the gall bladder, it would require a surgery or her gall bladder would rupture causing immediate death, but that the surgery, most dogs don't survive either. Are you kidding me? These are the options?
one last test to do... an ultrasound...
The vet came in with Buffy with a look on her face... I knew it wasn't good...
Her liver is covered with cancer... in her words, "Its covered in black spots that look like huge holes all over it"...
It was like a knock in the chest... Ricky even said, "When she said Buffy had cancer, it was like she just told me I had it"
She went on to explain that we can do chemo - but she's 11 years old & its really far advanced... but we had to do what we felt like we needed to do.
Ricky said if I was 77 years old & knew my cancer was that far gone, I wouldn't choose chemo for myself. Why make her life miserable when its so progressed?
So I asked the inevitable question... how long does she have?
Weeks... that was the answer... weeks...
I think my mind checked out for a few minutes... weeks? Really? That's just a small collection of days...
This is our yellow dog... she can't have WEEKS with us...
We asked the vet what she would do if this was her dog.
She said she wouldn't put her down right now either because Buffy still seems very happy... not in pain...
She is still happy... she still wants to play every day without fail...
this was just the other day... see? Always ready to play |
So they gave us some steroids & some medicine that helps protect the liver while taking steroids...
& she told us, we would know when its time to help Buffy ease her out of pain...
Just typing that makes instant tears come to my eyes & feels like someone is kicking me in the stomach...
We ended up leaving the vet's office & taking Buffy down to Dairy Queen - getting her a hamburger & some chicken strips... & she ate every bit of it...
we'll make every day of these last weeks with her happy - if there's anything we can do, that's it...
& now we wait...
We're not sure when to start this medicine. I think we're going to wait until Monday. I'm the same with Ricky in our thought process - is this really going to help her? Could it make it worse? Steroids aren't great for the liver anyways - hence the other medicine we had to buy... If she's happy & eating what she can right now, should we hold off on the medicine as long as we can?
Decisions... decisions we don't want to make...
& then we get home & her sisters & brother are waiting at the door, wondering where we took Buffy too... & I got all choked up thinking we're going to have to go through this 3 more times with our other dogs...
This is the tough side of being a pet owner...
But its like I told Ricky, there are sweet fur babies in this world that need good homes to take care of them... that's what we do...
even though it hurts...
So yeah... today, Ricky & I are just sad...
:-( ... that's all I got.
ReplyDeleteOh so sorry for you. It's so hard to lose a beloved pet who is so much a part of the family. I will keep you in my prayers.
ReplyDeleteI'm hear to say that there is no loss quite like the loss of a pet you've grown to love and adore so much. May God give you comfort and peace now and in the days ahead.
ReplyDeletePraying for you guys. I have been there before with our 16 year old sheltie and now our sweet Lily is 12. We love those fur babies. Praying for wisdom for you both.
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry. From experience, I know this is not easy. Will pray for all of you.
ReplyDeleteOh my heart is breaking for you! I wish I was closer to give you a hug! You all are in my thoughts and prayers!
ReplyDeleteI'm so so sorry - such a hard thing to go through!
ReplyDeleteOh, sweet girl. Hugs to you!
ReplyDeleteI think about this all the time with my pets. I hate the idea that they're not with us forever. HATE IT.
Buffy will tell you when it's time. Until then, hamburgers, chicken strips and lots of play time is better than any medicine, I say.
Love to you and Buffy. I know this pain and it is tough. I think you made the right choice. as sad as it is. Sending hugs!
ReplyDeleteTraci
I couldn't help but start crying. I am so sorry. Dogs have a special place in my heart. We lost a dog at one years old with cancer. My heart aches for you. ((HUGS)) I was at my hairdresser last week and we always talk about his young children and his dog. When I asked about his dog he got quiet. They just found out he has cancer and only has weeks left. They too have been giving him treats like table food he has never had before. He is only six years old. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
ReplyDeleteUnfortunately we just went through this with our 17 year old Yorkie. There are no words but know all of our hearts go out to you and Ricky.
ReplyDeleteSending big hugs your way. It's so hard when our pets are ill but none of us live forever here on earth. I love that you plan on making her last weeks happy! Our dog is 9 and we hope she has lots more good years yet to go.
ReplyDeleteOh friend! I'm so so sorry!!!!
ReplyDeleteOh sweet girl :( I am so sorry. I have been through something similar with our Yorkie we got right after we were married. They are our family. I just don't know what to say except lots of prayers and love being sent your way.
ReplyDeleteOh, I am so sorry. I know this won't you feel better, but take comfort in the few weeks you have left. Be strong, my friend!
ReplyDeleteI'm SO sorry friend!!! I don't even know what to say. I love you!!
ReplyDelete