Wednesday, March 18, 2015

Friendships... what a precious gift


What a special relationship that is.

REAL friends are so hard to come by.  And when you have them, they are blessings.

I always say when I see posts on other blogs, or Facebook posts, or Instagram pictures of girls going on a "Girls Weekend" or even a "Girls Night Out", my comment is always the same... "I'm Jealous"

I am a friendly person.  I have always had a lot of friends in my life.

But those deep friendship relationship are rare & hard to come by.

I had one super close friend in my life growing up.  Stephanie.  We were like sisters.  We were inseparable.  I can't imagine my life without her. 

But as you grow from teenagers to adults, you find your spouses & settle into your new life as a wife, distance got in the middle & I lost that friendship that we once had.  Now, I'm not saying I lost the friend, but the friendship changes.

When Ricky & I moved to Indiana, we met a couple down the street & we all instantly hit it off as friends.  Ironically, the female side of this couple, her name was Stephanie.  I just must be drawn to people with that name....

But it was an instant friendship that was dear.  One of those relationships where we talked every day, we made plans for every weekend, we found each other at one of our houses a few times a week.  Knitting at mine, dinner at hers.  Stephanie knew better then to expect me to cook.  Real friendships can handle truth like that.

I lost that friendship to liver cancer.

& I have many amazing friends in my life who have come into my life since Stephanie left this world.  I am blessed with amazing women who have become my friend since then.  Women who let me love on their family as they have loved on mine.  Women who still call or text or message me to see how life is going, how my parents or grandbabies are, what the latest news is. 


But I always say I miss that girlfriend relationship where you vent out your day every evening on the phone.... where you laugh about the funny things your husband did ... where you know you have someone who will go see that girly movie with you that your husband just dreads seeing as soon as the preview comes on. 

Those friendships are so precious.

I don't know if it's just me or if it's just the way social media works. 

I always tell my brides not to expect their wedding to look like something on Pinterest.  Because on Pinterest, you are seeing the ONE good picture of a LOT of weddings for one full day. 

Maybe I keep seeing people's pictures of girlfriends, & outings & hang outs & maybe it just seems like I'm the only one who is waiting for a friend to come pick me up & go shopping....

I saw where Melanie Shankle (AKA Big Mama) has written a new book about friendships.  & first of all, if you haven't ever read any of her books, you MUST. She's hilarious.  and real.
Pulled from Big Mama's Site

But I saw the video of the book & I instantly started crying at my desk.

Good thing I have a head cold.  My eyes have been watering all week so everyone just assumed it was my sinuses kicking in again. 

Just watch....

I'll totally read this book, because I do know what an amazing gift deep friendships are & how special & precious they are....

But it makes my heart ache a little as well....

Not really a point to my post today, but to just remind you to call your friend tonight.  Laugh about something.  Make plans to hang out.  Hold tight to the relationship you have with them.  Life changes way too quickly sometimes.

& if anyone is named Stephanie, give me a call.  I have a feeling we'll be instant friends. :)


  1. Good friends are amazing. A true gift from GOD!

  2. Oh my, I know exactly what you mean when your thought/comment is "I'm jealous". I too am still searching for a one true friend. I had what I thought was a one true friend, but after a decade of friendship, I discovered that she really didn't love me in spite of my flaws. The hurt that split caused, my introverted nature, and my lifelong insecurities have conspired to make it difficult (seemingly impossible) to find someone who will fill that need for a sister of the heart.

  3. i totally understand and love this post girl.
    i never had good friends growing up. i'm not being modest, i legit never had a best friend until i was 20. real friends are actually very hard to come by and i can count my real friends on one hand with a finger to spare.

  4. I hold my friendships so dear to me that I really trully only have a handful of best friends, but they are my everything! loved this post! xo, Biana

  5. My true friends are very limited {as in I can count them on one hand} and I often wonder what it would be like to have a big group of friends like that. But I'm so thankful for them even though the nature of our relationships have had to change throughout the years. I would be a big ball of a mess without their support!

  6. SO true about that Pinterest comment, NO bride on Earth has wedding photos where EVERY single one is pin-worthy. I think we do that with a lot of things. Friends are really hard as an adult though! We get so busy its hard to carve out time for eachother sometimes

  7. I know my co-workers think I'm crazy -- I was saying 'yep', 'uh-huh', and 'yep' again throughout your whole post. I had always pegged it to being a shy introvert and moving to a new city after getting married. My hubby's the extrovert and we live in his hometown, I'm the introvert and while I'm happy in my own little bubble, I definitely miss being with my own very small circle of friends. It's something I took for granted when we were growing up and in college -- but as an adult and being given adult responsibilities? I wish I had my friends closer and wish I were able to be close friends with people I've met in the last 17 years here. You may not have thought you had a point to the post but it made me think about and appreciate my friendships (or lack of close ones) and want to try to do better!

  8. Good friends are SO hard to come by, I've realized this since moving. I left all of my closest friends in Chicago and sometimes wonder why on Earth I did that?! But social media definitely makes things worse - it makes playing the comparison game way too easy.

  9. Oh how I love this post....find myself wishing my name started with and S! Wishing I lived next door to you....
    Growing up I thought I had so many friends. Truth be told many acquaintances, few true, got my back, loves me no matter friends.
    I get it and I so love ya!
    Would you like to move to California????


  10. Tearing up at my desk... yup. Friendships are so crazy, and moving 1,000 miles away, I value my friends (new ones here and old ones in New England) even more than I ever have. I definitely need to read that book and will be finding it asap!


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