Tuesday, August 19, 2014

Is it OK to say no?

If you know me, you know the words "overwhelmed schedule" is part of my life.  It's more then a part... its a LOT of my life.

I saw that quote above & instantly was on the hunt for this book.  I've got it ordered & it should be here any day. I can't wait.  I love Lysa Terkeurst so much anyways.

Why am I so busy?  Well, for starters, I do work a full time job... & I do my photography.

It's crazy how things work out.  I have always loved taking pictures - have always been obsessed with pictures.  I have had cameras in my hands at all times growing up.  Even the ones with the twist bulb flashes.... & I thought Polaroid instant developing pictures were like the most futuristic thing that was ever invented. 

I can remember going to the little Kodak stores that sat individual in front of our grocery story.  Asking the lady for certain film to go inside of the cheap camera I would get for Christmas.  You don't give a 10 yr old anything but a cheap camera.

Anyone else remember these things?

It had a drive through & when they would hand out the package that had developed pictures in it, it was like Christmas morning, every time.

& then it was always the worse when you paid for a package of 36 pictures & you see that only 2 or 3 are good pictures....

I always say I was the person that when someone would say, "Want to see our vacation photos?"... I was jumping with excitement while others would be groaning.

So it has been the biggest blessing to start taking pictures myself, getting more advanced cameras, learning techniques, learning the editing process.... pictures have come a long way - that's for sure....

People ask me when will I make that my full time job.  Oh my - wouldn't that be the  dream.  I just read the book, "Let's all be Brave" & the whole time, I'm thinking, does God want me to step out into this & do this full time?  But I have a full time job.  & granted, it does get on my nerves some day, & I kick & scream when I have to get up at 5:30 Monday - Friday & I think everyone has that dream of having their own business.  But I'm afraid.  & Ricky & I talk about it all the time, & he just doesn't feel confident in it yet. 

I mean, photography is a 'iffy' income. 

Right now though, it IS a full time job though.  I have been so blessed with it.  I have a full schedule for 2014 with a waiting list & just yesterday, I had 5 more people trying to squeeze in.  I am blessed.  I'll say it over & over again.... I am blessed.

But I don't like when the blessing turns into a stress.

It's not the job that's a stress.  I love it - I love capturing moments. I love meeting the people. I love giving people memories that last a lifetime.

The stress is time.

Pretty much right now, I'm doing 2 full time jobs.

& my life is taking a hit because of it.

I've got other things going on as well.  My home. My family.  Helping in youth ministry.  Working out, or usually some kind of half marathon training (which if you never trained for a run, you have no idea the time dedicated to it - its sorta ridiculous). 

I can't tell you how much I've missed out in because of doing 2 full time jobs.

I have missed my grandson's birthday parties.
I have missed my own father's last birthday.
I have missed my nephew's graduation.
I have missed a family reunion with family I haven't seen in at least 18 years.

& I see things that aren't getting full attention. 

My home.
My time with my husband & family.
My time for myself to just relax... you don't know how much 'relaxing' means when you don't ever get to do it.
My time with God.

It's crazy how a busy schedule can affect everything around you... how it can affect important things that matter to you.

Can you do it all?... I don't know - I'd like to think you can... but I do know that when you try, something's not getting the full attention.  & something has got to give.

Not sure if I believe this
.... so far, I have been doing everything :)

& truth be told, if I wasn't busy, I'd probably pull my hair out.

So how to balance it all is the thing....

I've been praying about this.  I've got Ricky praying about this.  I'll ask for you to pray about this for me.

I need to learn how to get it all balanced... I need to listen to where God wants me to be... I need peace on all of this... I need to learn its OK to say no.

I feel so bad when I have to say no to clients who want to get in a photo session.  But when I say yes to one thing, I'm saying no to something else...

I just want to do it all... who doesn't?

& this whole post?  It's not to complain. I hope it doesn't sound like I am complaining about anything.  Ok, maybe I am complaining about my dirty house.  I'll always complain about that.  I'll say it again - I am blessed.

I just needed to vent.  To hear someone else tell me its ok to say no. 

I tell Ricky the phone calls & emails I get & the list of things I need to do & he helps me sometimes try to figure it out on the calendar, & he is always the most supportive on everything I do.... & I told him one time, "You know, I think sometimes the best thing I think you can tell me is that its totally OK if I don't do it all."....

Because Ricky & I look like Elena & Damon
... except with red hair...
Does someone else need to hear that today?

It's OK to say no... it's OK to look at your priorities & rearrange it... its OK ... the world isn't going to end.

I need to repeat that to myself all the time lately ....

I just know I can't wait to get my new book in "The Best Yes"

... & I hope I have time to be able to read it.....


  1. Such truth in this post, girl! I feel like you are talking about my life currently! I don't have two full-time paying jobs, but I def have two full-time jobs and everything is taking a hit. I have really been praying about my hours at work. We need my hours at work financially, but something has to give. I will pray for your situation!!

  2. It is completely ok to say no! I once had a full time job, went to school full time, was a wife and parent, taught bible study, sang in ye worship team, danced in the worship dance team, and was youth pastor. Do you think I was happy? I was doing so many things for The Lord, yet my busy schedule was taking away from my time with The Lord. So as much as I did for him I was beginning to not know the God I was doing it all for. I was tired, became resentful and bitter. Like how does a human do it all? You can't! You have to take rests. I hope the book does wonders for you Rebecca. It is great that you enjoy everything you do, but taking time to enjoy it all is also part of the package. :)

  3. Great words girl! YES it's definitely ok to say NO and I've been getting a lot better over the last several months. I've been saying no and being a little selfish with our time on the weekends. Having time to sit at home and actually relax and do things we want to do has made such an amazing difference. Lately I've said no to blog stuff and social stuff. I don't want to let people down, but the stress I was feeling was just too much. Do what makes you happy! I'm praying for you :)

  4. I convinced my overwhelmed daughter to pay someone to come in and clean at least every two weeks. Find out the hourly charge and then figure out how many hours you can afford. Then prioritize what you want cleaned the most...I really changed her stress level and opened up a little bit of down time for her..
    On aside note, learning to say no it the most freeing thing ever!!!!


  5. Love love love Lysa Terkeurst.. her books always speak right to my soul and I can't wait for this new one! I think it is 100% okay to say no sometimes. Easier said than done of course but the way I look at it is that I have to say "no" to a few things so I can give what I REALLY care about my best self and my full attention. Saying a prayer for you!

  6. I firmly believe that I cannot do everything... at least not if I want to be happy! My house needs to be cleaned, my husband wants attention, my kids need help with their spelling... but I need time for me!


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